Being a Wolf
by Phanael
Summary: One Shot about Sirius and Remus. Sirius has a bad dream and Remus soothes him. The Werewolf takes over the situation...I love that Remus is a werewolf XD !Complete!


These are just two scenes I had in mind. I combined them and now they're a short story. ;)

Pairing: Our beloved werewolf and the capricious Animagus

Rating: T? yepp….

Disclaimer: Not mine…

Being a Wolf

When I wake up it was still dark and I'm sure if I heard anything at all. Except me there is only one other person in this room: Sirius Black. Thank God seven year students are allowed to share smaller bedrooms instead of a dormitory. But I sometimes miss James and Peter. Well, they share the bedroom next door but it isn't the same, really.

My thoughts are interrupted, when I hear another muffled cry from the direction of Sirius' bed. Aha… he wouldn't bring any of his girls here, would he? Not when I sleep in the bed next to him? I look over, my eyes adjusted to the dark room. No, he lies there alone. I sigh, but then another cry reaches my ears. I'm curious and get up from my bed. Is he crying? His eyes are closed and his hands are fists, clutching his sheets.

"No…please, don't!", he whispers. In the pale moonlight I can see sweat forming on his forehead. He is dreaming and I suppose he doesn't like it. "No… Mum, NO!", he yells, thrashing about in his bed. I sit down on his mattress. He often has bad dreams and they all contain his mother… I never met anyone who hates his family as much as Sirius does and it scares me. My hands reach for his shoulders, grasping him, shaking him awake. "NO! No, Mum, please, please…" Oh Merlin! I know what he's dreaming about.

He once told me: When he was a little boy his mother used to lock him in the subbasement when he had done something wrong. I was shocked. No mother should do this to his child. Since these days Sirius was afraid of dark and narrow rooms. And I can understand that so well… I would be afraid, too.

I shake him and his words end in a low murmur. So I was able to wake him up at least. "S'okay, Sirius, it's me, Remus." His eyes open and he stared at me, his deep silvery eyes like diamonds in the dark of our bedroom. "Look, everything's all right. I'm here with you, nothing will happen." I know these words sound empty. But I have to say something to soothe him. Guess it's my voice that soothes him and not those senseless words. "I'll light up a candle.", I say, looking around for matches on his nightstand. When I lit the candle he lies still on his bed, looking up at the ceiling.

"She hates me so much…", he whispers and his small voice breaks my heart. No one knows this side on him. James knows what happened but he doesn't know that it follows Sirius into his dreams. I am the only one seeing him like that and I hate it. Slowly he sits up, his hair hiding his pale but still so beautiful face. My smile is weak but he seems grateful that I'm with him. "I dream about these nights in our basement so often… I hate it. So dark and cold." His voice trails off and my heart breaks one more time.

Normally Sirius is the smart one, always cracking jokes and planning pranks but sometimes, he is more like a child than the rest of us. But I don't care. After all this is Sirius, one of my best friends and I would do so much for him… he became and Animagus for me. It had been his idea and I love him for that. Well… I love many things about him. But that's normal, isn't it? We're close friends. That's only normal.

"I'll stay with you if it helps." I offer. It wouldn't be the first time I sleep in his bed. When he awakes from his bad dreams he sometimes asks me to stay with him and I do. Another night he would walk over to my bed, if I hadn't wake up from his muffled cries. This time Sirius simply nods and I lay down next to him, reaching out for his hand and intertwine our fingers. His hands shake and I can feel him tremble next to me. "It's okay, Siri. I'm here with you.", I whisper.

"Thank you, Remus.", he says, coming a bit closer. Feel his breath on my shoulder I smile. I like when he's close to me. And I like that he trusts me. When I'm sure he's asleep, I dare to drift to sleep as well. His steady breath soothes me, his warmth surrounds me and I drift into darkness….

----

When I wake up again it is morning. Saturday. We can stay in bed as long as we want. I know I've dreamed of Sirius. His beautiful face is the only thing I can remember. It wasn't a dream a close friend should have. Sometimes I ask myself how we can stand this situation. We are so close, literally acting like an old, married couple, yet we haven't confessed our love for each other. I guess he knows as well. He isn't dumb or blind. Perhaps he wants to be sure, like me. I AM sure, but I'm afraid… Smiling and sighing I try to snuggle closer to Sirius, but he's gone.

I hear the faints sound of water from the bathroom. It is Sirius taking a shower, I can hear him whistle like he always uses to do. He always whistles when we have slept together in one of our beds.

The werewolf in me awakes, I can feel it. He often does lately. The animal in me needs a mate and I know but I refuse to let him his way. I won't give in to my animalistic side. But my heart agrees… I yearn for Sirius with every fibre of my being. Especially the werewolf in me. He is at full attention listening to every sound from the bath.

When Sirius enters our room he only wears a towel around his waist. He always does but today the wolf in me reacts and my pants feel tighter than before. Damn it! But Sirius looks so sexy. His chest exposed, his hair still damp and small drops of water running down his chest and flat stomach. My eyes follow it's trail while my nose fills with Sirius scent, a mixture of water, soap and so much of himself… I inhale deeply and he flows through my veins like a drug. I hate the wolf. I love the wolf. He makes me so aware of Sirius.

I jump up from the bed, not fully conscious of what I'm doing. Sirius gasps when I shove his back against a wall and raise my knee so that it touches him between his legs… I would never be so bold if it wasn't for the wolf in me.

Sirius' eyes look at me, questioningly but still hopeful. His face is flushed, a light pink on his otherwise pale cheeks. He is so beautiful. Before I know what I'm doing, my lips claim his, kissing him deeply, my tongue darting out between his lips. He opens them obediently and I kiss him hungrily. How I long for him. How much I want him. Hesitantly his hands wander up and down my back. I think I surprised him but he likes it. The wolf in me howls with joy when I feel him respond to my kiss. His hands press me closer still and I can feel him moan into my mouth.

By now he must feel how much he is needed. I press my body flush against him but he doesn't shove me away. I'm happy. I need him so much it hurts. We've waited so long but now it's too late. When we need to come up for air he looks at me with those silvery eyes I love so much. He doesn't look afraid. His lips are deep red and swollen from our long kiss. "I love you!", he murmurs and finds my lips in a split second for another kiss. It's all I can do to prevent from coming right then and there.

Padfoot loves me. Sirius loves me. My best friend loves me.

And I love him. So much.

I want him! I turn us around and we fall onto the bed, where I pin his body beneath mine and kiss him again and again, my lips wandering down over his neck and towards his chest. "Love you, too.", I whisper against his skin and I hear his gasp.

Here we are, lost in our passion.

For the first time I'm grateful I'm a werewolf. Only the wolf in me gave me the strength to confess this…

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